Pregnancy Announcement: And Then Came Baby 3…

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Well, here it is. Our pregnancy announcement. If you want to know and hear the whole story here goes. Still even at this moment, I am terrified to put anything into writing, to plan, to have hopes. I’m just nervous, and probably more so with all these pregnancy hormones. But, this decision was incredibly thought out… agonized over. Until it wasn’t… haha. Let me explain.

Our Pregnancy Announcement

When I was pregnant with Elston, and even when she was born, I didn’t treat her like my last baby and never truly felt ‘done’. I always knew I wanted a big family and more than that, knew I wanted my kids to have people in this world that they would be the most close to. Robert and I talked early on about 3 or even 4 kids, and that number lessened and wavered as we tackled colicky babies and the toddler years haha. But we were pretty much on the same page with our wavering.

At times I thought our family was just perfect the way it was, how would throwing in a new dynamic change EVERYTHING. Then we would look at each other and just say ‘we’re not done’. This truly went on for 2.5 years. I started thinking about it when Elston was 15 months, the age Jackson was when I became pregnant with Elston. But 2 rocked our world and we were barely surviving. I just wasn’t ready. Would I ever be? I kept putting off the decision, but it was a constant state of mental unrest for me.

For 2 years I went back and forth, it was torture. I did know that it needed to be this fall or never. Elston is reaching age 4 and I just didn’t want any more time to be between the last baby and her. I also wanted it to be born within this school year, because to me, next year was another grade between the kids… I know this all sounds crazy and I understand it won’t matter as adults, but now, it is important to me. I knew that once we reached a decision, at least mentally, I could move forward. This is where my personality takes reign a little bit.

I had been on birth control and needed to refill it one weekend to start on Sunday night. We had been out of town and I forgot to fill it. I’ve filled it and doubled up on Mondays a few times before and this time I was just like well… I just won’t. We will either get pregnant, or not, and then I’ll move on with the decision. Well, first try… I acknowledge we are lucky. A part of our lives that we have been very lucky on. But this also didn’t give me a lot of time to process. I mean, I like (over) thinking things and I definitely didn’t get to!

I cried the entire first two weeks. I was terrified I would not be a good mother to the kids, or give them what they need in life by adding in another one. (keep in mind a mother can have all kinds of crazy thoughts) I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to handle it… mentally AND physically.

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Then I cried for Elston and just mourned the end of her infancy. She is my baby, and I always want to remember her this way. I was afraid of taking away her special place in the family. I have obviously come around, but I was a mess the first few weeks. I was also dead to the world basically for 3 months. All I did was eat happy meals and fall asleep everywhere. That can just about sum it up.

But as we hurdle over the 4 month mark, the skies are opening a bit. The kids are so excited. Telling them was kind of anti-climactic where Robert and I were kind of like ta-daaaa and waiting, and then a slow clap kind of gist. But we have talked about it and made sure each child knows their role of value in this journey. Every time Jackson talks about it he smiles with his little dimples. Elston has told me she doesn’t want the baby to come out of my tummy and mess up her room, but she also said they will be best friends. As for what it is, well, that will be a whole other post. Thank you for following the journey with us a we prepare for April 2020, I can’t wait to share more!

Photos by the talented Naomi Hopkins Photography

Kids’ outfits both from Zara, my outfit details are below, velvet dress is c/o Eliza J

If you’re looking for family photo outfit inspo and color ideas (I just color scheme questions a lot), I like to play with a few colors but not do matchy matchy. This year I worked from my velvet dress b/c I’ve had it for years and it just worked (I also wanted this dress against a white cotton field for years as well). I planned everything around two colors: rose/raspberry and sky blue in Jackson’s sweater. That is the same color in Robert’s shirt, and then I threw in Navy on the rest of the details, including Elston’s boots.

If you still have any questions after reading this pregnancy announcement let me know in a comment below!